RELATIONSHIPS
From Issue #19
Getting Deep
Your tough questions answered
Q&A with Dr. Dorothy
My boyfriend thinks that we're going to be together
forever, but I know we won't be. So whenever he
says it, I agree with him because I don't want to
hurt his feelings. How can I tell him how I really
feel without upsetting him?
While you can’t prevent your boyfriend from feeling hurt or
upset, what you can do is be honest with him. If the roles
were reversed, I hope that you would want to know the truth
about how he feels. Crystal ball aside, if you know that you
and your boyfriend aren’t going to end up together someday,
it’s important to say so. Your relationship (or the way you
both view it) may certainly change once you explain how you
feel, but in the end, the two of you should talk openly and
honestly about where your relationship is going.
I see all these horrible things happening in the world, and I
don't want to sit here doing nothing about it. I want to help
people overseas who are currently at a disadvantage, but I
don't know where to go. Is there anything a person my age can
do to help?
There is much that each of us can do. I think it’s great that
you feel the need to help those who live their lives under
very different conditions. Having a cause that tugs at your
heartstrings will certainly make your decision about how to
help that much easier. Below are some ideas of how you can
help on a global scale:
TakingITGlobal.org is a global online community, providing
youth with inspiration to make a difference, a source of
information on issues, opportunities to take action, and a
bridge to get involved locally, nationally and globally.
Earthbeat is an organization for young people interested in
global justice issues.
Environment Canada offers programs for Youth and the
Environment.
Canada World Youth designs and delivers international
educational programs for youth (aged 17-29) with a focus on
volunteer work and community development in a crosscultural
setting.
My parents are constantly fighting, and I can’t concentrate on
my homework. They are also really overprotective and won’t
let me leave the house to study at the library or at a
friend’s house. They also don’t like me travelling by myself.
This is driving me nuts. What should I do?
Explain your needs to your parents. Hopefully they can put
their disagreements aside long enough to give you some
quiet time in which to study. The bigger issue, however,
might be their overprotectiveness. Do your best to negotiate
opportunities to get out more, reassuring your parents by
checking in with them and respecting agreed-upon curfews.
Being allowed to have some (even small) freedoms is a
success that you can build upon, enabling you to become
evenmore independent.
My parents are pressuring me to choose a career
before I graduate high school. They say I need
direction. I am an honour roll student, but I think
I need more time to figure all this out. How can I get
them to see my point of view?
You may not actually get them to understand your need for
more time, but can they really force you to decide on a
career before you are ready? The choice (thankfully) is still
yours although you may want to reassure them that you are
working on it!
For more on Dorothy check out www.dorothyratusny.com
