What
is sex?
Most people have a general idea what constitutes sex, although
lawyers sometimes make it more complex. For the purpose of this
page we will consider sex as genital contact with someone other
than yourself with the intent to achieve orgasm. This means
sex includes traditional intercourse as well as anal and oral
intercourse. It would also include hand jobs, "outer sex" (rubbing
bodies without actual intercourse), etc.
The
urge for sex is built into most creatures so they will reproduce.
In most mammals the female is only receptive to sex at certain
times (when she is most likely to get pregnant). The males are
almost always ready for sex. Human females are able to have
sex at any time during their cycle, although some women report
being more in the mood for sex near the middle of their cycles
( when they are most likely to conceive). For most human beings
the sex drive has a biological/hormonal component as well as
a strong psychological component. We are able to "think" ourselves
into or out of the desire for sex. We are not driven solely
by instincts and hormones.
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Homosexuality
Homosexuality is the sexual attraction between 2 people of the
same sex, that is female to female (lesbian) or male to male.
What causes homosexuality is unclear although it is probably
related to both genetic background and environmental/social
influences. Some studies have shown areas on the X chromosome
that tend to be the same in homosexual men which may indicate
a hereditary component to male homosexuality. On the other hand,
identical twins which contain the same genetic make-up are not
always both homosexual. Studies show that if one identical twin
is homosexual, the other twin is homosexual in 50% of the cases.
This means that there probably is an inborn tendency to homosexuality
but that other influences (social, hormonal, etc.) may play
a significant role in a person's sexual preferences.
Why
are homosexual men at higher risk of contracting HIV and AIDS?
AIDS was first detected in this country in the homosexual population.
In the late 1970's and early 80's some homosexual males were
extremely promiscuous and had sex with many different partners.
Although the HIV virus probably originated in Africa as a mutated
monkey virus, it slowly began to spread to people in other continents.
The disease spread most rapidly in those populations that were
most promiscuous and engaged in risky sexual activity. Anal
sex, which is practiced by many homosexual males, may increase
the chance of transmitting the HIV virus, especially to the
receptive partner. This is because small tears to the lining
of the anus may occur during sex allowing the virus to enter
the blood stream. The presence of sores due to herpes or syphilis
may also increase the chance of spreading HIV regardless of
the type of sex activity.
Female
homosexuals are not a population at increased risk of HIV infection.
This is primarily because they are less promiscuous but also
may be related to the type of sex practiced between women. Although
sexually transmitted diseases can be spread by oral and outer
sex, penetration of the vagina or anus with exchange of bodily
fluids is a much more efficient route to transmit HIV. Lesbians
are not immune to STDs and should keep in mind that any sore
on the genitalia or mouth increases the chance of transmitting
disease. Sex toys that are shared or not properly washed (bleach
and water) can also spread disease.
Female
Sexual Anatomy:
The female external genitalia consists of the labia, vaginal
opening (introitus), and clitoris. Between the clitoris and
the vagina is the urethra or tube to the bladder. The urethra
is short in the female and its close proximity to the anus and
vagina makes it very easy for bacteria to enter during sex leading
to bladder and urethral infection. The clitoris is the most
sensitive part of the female genitalia and is most likely to
lead a woman to orgasm when stimulated.
Male
Sexual Anatomy:
The
male external genitalia consists of the penis and scrotum. The
scrotum contains the 2 testes which are the organs that produce
sperm. The penis consists of the shaft and the head or glans.
If the man has not been circumcised, he will have loose skin
(the foreskin) covering a portion of the head of the penis.
This skin retracts easily in normal, healthy men. Circumcised
males do not have foreskin. The urethral opening is at the tip
of the penis and is the exit for both semen and urine. The urethra
is the tube that leads from the bladder to the outside. In the
male the vas deferens/ejaculatory duct which carries sperm also
connects to the urethra so it can function as a conduit for
semen as well as urine.
Varieties
of sexual activity: Anal sex is practiced by heterosexual
as well as homosexual couples. At least 20% of heterosexual
couples report having had anal sex. Because anal tissue is more
delicate than vaginal tissue, tears and injury are much more
likely to occur. The natural lubrication that occurs in the
vagina is also absent in the anus so lubricating jelly is often
necessary to prevent injury. Because of the possibility of small
tears during anal sex, the transmission of disease is more likely
so caution and the use of condoms is recommended.
Some
studies have reported a greater incidence of anal cancer in
recipients of anal sex, but this is most likely related to anal
infection with human papilloma virus (HPV) rather than the sex
act itself.
Oral
sex is called fellatio when performed on the male and cunnilingus
when performed on the female. This type of sex is frequently
practiced with a false sense of security. It is true that oral
sex alone will not lead to pregnancy, but ORAL SEX CAN TRANSMIT
STD! Keep in mind that oral herpes can be transmitted to the
genitalia and in some people HPV can be transmitted this way.
Outer
sex includes manual stimulation (hand jobs), pelvic rubbing,
etc. Outer sex limits the risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted
disease if there are no open sores on the external genitalia
and if ejaculation occurs away from the opening of the vagina.
Outer sex can be difficult to control and the desire for more
may lead to intercourse. Keep this in mind before engaging in
outer sex without a handy supply of condoms.
Vaginal
sex is penetration of the vagina by the penis. This is traditionally
what is thought of as intercourse.
In
the female virgin the entrance to the vagina is often partially
blocked by a membranous tissue called the hymen. The size of
the hymen varies greatly among females. Some virginal girls
have virtually no hymen and others have enough tissue to make
using tampons difficult. The presence of the hymen will sometimes
make the first vaginal intercourse painful and bleeding is not
unusual. Subsequent intercourse is generally much easier.
Orgasm:
Orgasm is the rhythmic contraction of pelvic muscles and pleasant
sensations that occur after a buildup of sexual tension and
arousal. It is caused by a combination of responses of the autonomic
nervous system and to a hormone called oxytocin.
In
men orgasm is accompanied by ejaculation. Both men and women
are able to have orgasms but reaching orgasm requires a longer
period of sexual arousal in the female. Arousal in both sexes
is manifested by an increase in blood flow to the genitalia
resulting in an erect penis or swollen labia and lubricated
vagina.
Reaching
orgasm involves the brain as well as the body. Self-consciousness,
distractions, stress can all inhibit sexual pleasure and interfere
with orgasm. For both men and women a relaxed and generous attitude
is important to enjoy sex. Communication is also important.
The clitoris is equivalent to the penis where sexual stimulation
is concerned. Because the clitoris is located well above the
vagina, sometimes manual stimulation of the clitoris is essential
during intercourse to help a woman reach orgasm.
The
G-spot is an area in the vagina which overlies the paraurethral
glands. It is located a few centimeters into the vagina on the
front (belly-side) wall. This area when stimulated can produce
orgasm in some women. In men a similar phenomenon can be induced
by massaging the perineum (skin between the base of the scrotum
and the anus). This actually is stimulating the prostate which
can enhance male orgasm.
Length
of orgasm is similar in males and females (a few seconds); however
the period of time between subsequent arousal and orgasm is
longer in the male. Females can have more than one orgasm per
period of sexual arousal; however these orgasms are usually
weaker than the first one.
Masturbation:
Masturbation is the stimulation of one's own sexual organs to
bring about orgasm. Some religions have taboos about masturbation
and it is best that you follow your own conscience in this regard.
From a non-religious point of view, masturbation is a harmless
way to release sexual tension without risk of sexually transmitted
disease, pregnancy, etc. It is a way for people without partners
to release sexual tension and urges. This is a much healthier
way to do this than engaging in anonymous or emotionless sex.
Masturbation can help you learn about your own body and its
sexual responses.
Most
people masturbate at some time in their lives. As Dr. Joycelyn
Elders says "its healthy, safe and you won't go blind"
Wet
Dreams
Wet dreams are also called nocturnal emissions and are an involuntary
ejaculation during sleep. This may occur in young males in association
with erotic dreams. It is very common and should not be a cause
for alarm or concern.
Should
I have sex?
The decision to have sex is a personal one and based on our
own mores, culture and upbringing. Our society has become more
sexually charged with sex talk and sexy images present everywhere.
Unfortunately we have not become more sexually aware. People
have sex at a younger age and with more partners but the sex
is not better and more fulfilling. Actually it is quite the
opposite. Sex becomes impersonal, riskier and mundane. A person
decides to have sex for the first time for many different reasons.
Curiosity is one of the most common. Before you have sex consider
the following:
- When
you sleep with someone, you also sleep with all their previous
partners (STD-wise)
- A
pregnancy will change your life completely
- When
in doubt, don't have sex
For girls first sex is usually not that great. So why rush into
it? Sex will improve, however, with a loving, devoted partner.
What
is safe sex?
"Safe sex" should really be called "safer sex" because no sex
is entirely safe. Safer sex basically is the reduction in risk
of sexually transmitted diseases by the use of condoms. Condom
use can make sex more fun if you use your imagination.
See: http://www.condomania.com
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