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Rape
Courtesy of
Rape
is the act of sexual intercourse forced upon a person. It includes
penetration of the anus, vagina or mouth by the penis or foreign
object. It is a violent crime and both females and males of all
ages can be victims.
Among females about 60% of rape cases are less than 18 years old.
22% are ages 18 to 24. 70 to 80% of victims know their attacker.
In 1996 it is estimated that only about 1/3 of rapes and sexual
assaults were reported to police. Statistics regarding the
total number of rapes that occur are difficult to determine because
of failure to report and biased surveys.
Date or acquaintance rape is forced/non-consensual
sexual intercourse between people that know one another, even
if briefly. This includes rape within marriage, by a boyfriend
or fiance, or by a casual friend, "blind date", etc. This
does not include anonymous rape that may occur during a robbery,
home invasion, etc. Acquaintance rape is the most common
type of rape and often goes unreported. It is not uncommon
on college and university campuses for several reasons:
1) High use of alcohol and drugs.
45% of rapists are under the influence of drugs or alcohol when
they commit the crime. Drugs and alcohol can also cloud
the judgement of both males and females and limit the ability
of a woman to make a choice about sex. If a woman has passed
out she cannot consent to sex, so technically this could be considered
rape.
2) Ill-defined personal and social sexual values
Many college age and younger people have not closely examined
their own sexuality. They have not thought carefully about
what situations and circumstances they want to when having sex.
Many females like to romanticize about getting carried away with
the moment and have not set personal limits on their interaction
with the opposite sex. They are not firm about their opinions
and then end up in a room alone with a man who assumes they will
be having sex. Many males have been socialized to feel their
interaction with a woman should have sex as its goal. They
feel peer pressure "to score". They also have not really
examined their sexuality except to follow the male hormonal urge
that more sex is better.
3) Misunderstandings between males and females
Some men think that if a woman dresses provocatively, flirts and
goes with him to his room, she must want sex. Even though
these may seem like very definite signals to some males,
sex is not guaranteed. Many men also do not interpret "no"
as an emphatic "NO!" Some women are passive and shy and
are not as firm about their wishes as they should be. They
feel that it is not "ladylike" or that they may offend if they
are loud and firm about not wanting to have intercourse.
To
avoid date rape a woman should first examine her own sexuality.
Under what circumstances do I want to have sex? What kind
of signals should I send when I am interacting with a man?
Be firm and clear with yourself before you date or go out with
a man. Be aware of and stick to your own opinions.
When you are on your date or outing make choices. Don't
just passively follow all of his suggestions. If he wants
to go to a room alone, and that does not fit with your plan--SAY
NO-- and then recommend an alternative. Have back-up plans
available for getting home, etc. Also don't let him pay
for everything. Some men think an expensive date entitles
them to sex. Be alert for warning signs: He encourages
you to drink too much or take drugs. He acts aggressively
and ignores your comments and opinions. He drinks too much
or takes drugs and begins to get aggressive. If these warning
signs arise, go to your back-up plan. Call a friend.
Don't end up in a room or car alone with him.
Also don't let yourself drink too much or over indulge in drugs.
It may seem fun at the time but staying in control will help you
avoid a nasty situation.
If
your are raped:
1. Do not shower or bathe right away. You will wash
away valuable evidence.
2. Call a friend or family member who can help you and give
you emotional support.
3. Seek medical attention at a clinic, emergency room etc.
4. Report attack to university authorities, police, etc.
Be honest about what happened. Even if you were high or
drinking, you did not deserve to be raped.
5. Seek rape counseling
6. Rape crisis hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE
Rohypnol:
Rohypnol or "roofies" has also been called the date rape drug.
Rohypnol is a sedative similar to valium but much, much stronger.
It is manufactured by Roche corporation but is not approved for
medical use in this country. It is smuggled into the US
illegally most often from Mexico and Latin America. Alone
it causes drowziness and decreased awareness. It is sometimes
used to soften the depression that follows a stimulant high. Mixed
with alcohol it can cause severe disorientation, amnesia and loss
of consciousness. Because it is tasteless and dissolves easily
in many liquids it has become notorious as a drug that may be
used surreptitiously to make a person vulnerable to rape, robbery
etc. There have been reports of women at parties who wake up wearing
no clothes and with no memory of the previous evening's events.
Advice to men:
Do not force yourself on a woman even if she wears provocative
dress, flirts, goes into a room alone with you, etc.
Do not force a woman to have sex against her will even if she
has had sex with you in the past.
Do not expect sex in exchange for an expensive date.
Be careful of alcohol and drugs especially if you tend to become
angry or aggressive when drinking.
If a woman is semi-conscious or unconscious, she cannot consent
to sex. So technically sex with such a woman is rape.
Don't disregard even weak protestations about sex. If in
doubt, KEEP IT OUT!
Male Rape:
Men can be the victims of rape and unfortunately it is not a rare
occurence. Men often do not report rape because of the social
stigma about homosexuality. Male rape is rarely discussed
so many men feel there is no one available to help them.
Like women, men are raped most often by someone they know.
This could be a teacher, boyfriend, neighbor, date, etc.
Drugs and alcohol also play a significant role in male rape in
that they make the victim less alert and aware of his surroundings.
Male rape victims should follow the same guidelines as women in
the section "what to do if you are raped"
Because most rape hotlines are set-up to help female rape victims,
men might get more gender appropriate help by contacting one of
the numbers at this link: http://www.xris.com/survivor/msa/hotlines.html
Possible
scenarios-- Is it rape?
Answers at bottom of page.
1.John
and Jane have been dating for 6 months. Saturday night
they went to a club and danced and drank heavily. It was
a great evening. They go back to John's apartment.
Jane is worn out and flops down on the bed. She falls
asleep almost immediately. John is not so tired.
He massages and kisses Jane and removes her clothes. She
wakes up and gives him a kiss. John enters Jane and begins
to thrust. Jane murmurs "I'm tired". John asks "is
it ok?" Jane answers "yes, but I don't have my diaphragm
in--I might get pregnant" John comes a few seconds later.
Is it rape?
2.
Paula sashays seductively as she takes off her clothes and whispers
to Mike "I've been waiting to have sex with you all night".
Mike and Paula fall into bed and start to kiss. First
they "do it" in the missionary position. Next Mike flips
Paula over and tries to enter her from the rear. Paula
says "I don't want to do it this way".
Mike persists "oh come on lets try something new". He
pushes himself into her.
"Not that way".
"Don't be a prude, Paula". He continues thrusting harder.
"Stop it!" she shouts and kicks away from him and rolls out
of the bed.
Is it rape?
3.
Tim, Carl and Bob had been out for drinks and had just come
back to Bob's place. Tim grabs Bob from behind and snarls
"we'll kill your cat if you don't give us each a blowjob".
Bob whispers "please don't hurt my cat".
"Do Tim first and then me".
Bob performs oral sex on both Tim and Carl. Afterwards
Tim and Carl laugh "we weren't even sure you had a cat".
Is it rape?
LINKS
Answers
To Possible Rape Scenerios
1.
No it is not rape, although there is a high risk of pregnancy.
2.
Yes, this is rape. Even though Paula agreed to have sex the
"traditional" way, she made it clear to Mike she did not want
sex from the rear. Mike forced Paula to have sex.
Despite the fact that Paula got away before Mike ejaculated,
this still is rape. It would be very difficult for Paula
to prove rape to an outsider in this case, but this would be
a man to avoid because such behaviour is likely to happen again.
3.
This is definitely rape even if Tim and Carl acted like
it was a joke.
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