In every issue of FAZE MAGAZINE, our readers bare their souls to Ed The Sock & Red, Canada’s high priest and priestess of morality, etiquette and, especially, common sense. Here are Ed & Red’s unfettered and heartfelt replies.
Send in your own questions and hopefully Ed & Red will be able to answer you in an upcoming issue of FAZE.
ISSUE #22 Q & A
Faze Reader:
I’ve been with my girlfriend for about a year and recently she’s been asking me to buy her lunch all the time. If I don’t, she says that I’m cheap and she threatens to break up with me. What’s wrong with her and what should I do?
ED REPLIES:
Where do you people find such creatures? Call her bluff. Relationships are built on love, trust and support — not a meal at the food court. If her only reason for staying with you is a free lunch, you’re better off with someone who has a little more emotional range.
Faze Reader:
I met this girl over summer break when I was visiting family in BC and we’ve kept in touch over the past few months. Even though she’s nice and all, I am beginning to think this is going nowhere because I live in Ontario and we’re so far away. I’d like to be friends but how do I break up without destroying everything?
ED REPLIES:
Destroying everything? You must be a teenager, I can smell the melodrama. Somehow I think the universe will survive you ending things with her. Besides, what do you have to destroy? She’s just a penpal. Relationships require time together, not passionately typed missives on Messenger.
Faze Reader:
I’ve been baby sitting my cousins even before I was legally allowed to. Because I was sitting for family, I never complained about the meagre earnings I made. Now I’m 17 and I don’t think it’s fair how they’re using blood ties as an excuse to be stingy. How can I ask for a raise without appearing ungrateful?ED REPLIES:
Ungrateful? For what, the opportunity to give up your free time for poverty-level wages? It’s your cousins who are ungrateful. Ask them for a raise. They were teenagers once, they’ll understand. And if they don’t, let them find some other sucker to mind their rugrats.
Faze Reader:
Apart from your own column and work as a VJ on Much Music, is there anything else you enjoy doing?
ED REPLIES:
That’s making the assumption that I enjoy doing this column and being a VJ on Muchmusic. Let’s talk about the VJ thing. I wish I had a nickel for every teenager that’s asked me how to become a VJ, like it’s a dream job. It’s not! Sure, I get to talk to stars, but most of them are dull and boring, and there’s nothing more disappointing than meeting someone who’s music you like only to find out they’re a robot. And any job is work. Sure, it’s better than digging ditches, but when you’re digging ditches, you don’t have to deal with TV industry egos. So, stay in school and set your sights higher than VJ stardom. For most, it’s fleeting.
Faze Reader:
Guys are so mean! There’s this guy I like and we talk occasionally when we’re not in school, like when I run into him at the mall. But when we’re in school, he totally ignores me. I tried to talk to him the other day and he pretended like he didn’t even know who I was, quickly said something stupid and walked away. The worst part is, I heard him and his friends break out into this huge laugh when they turned the corner and I’m sure it was about me. Can you figure this out?
ED REPLIES:
Yes – he’s a jackass. Got it Sherlock?
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