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In every issue of FAZE MAGAZINE,
our readers bare their souls to
Ed & Red, Canada's high priest and priestess of morality, etiquette and, especially, common sense.
Here are Ed & Red's unfettered and heartfelt replies.
Send your own questions to ed@faze.ca and hopefully Ed & Red will be able to answer you in an upcoming issue of FAZE.
ISSUE #18 Q & A
Faze Reader:
What do you think about the Iraq war? Do you have the same
opinion as most Canadians and think Bush is a complete moron?
ED REPLIES:
Well, not a complete moron - that would let
him off the hook too easily for the damage he's done.
I think that the defeat of a dictator anywhere in the world is a
good thing, but only if you have a plan to foster improved conditions
in the tyrant's country that are consistent with the values of the
people who live there. So I think Bush pooched the whole thing.
Now, please let me deal with more weighty issues of
teen angst, such as this next one...
Faze Reader:
My two best friends are going out with the same guy and don’t
know it. Add to the problem, this guy is one of my closest friends.
He knows it’s wrong but he says he is having too much fun. Should I
do something about it?
ED REPLIES:
Ever hear that phrase, "Don't shoot the messenger?"
Well, they do. Like a guy whose girlfriend asks him "do these jeans
make me look fat?", you're in a no-win situation as soon as you open
your mouth. Let them find out for themselves, and be there to help
them afterward. But don't let them know you already knew,
or you're sunk.
Faze Reader:
The other day
I caught my boyfriend
using my oil-free face
lotion. I told my
girlfriends and they
said it’s this thing
called “metrosexuals”
where guys take just
as much care of
themselves as girls.
But I still can’t get
used to him looking at
his zits more than I do
and frankly, it creeps
me out. Can I dump
him over something
so stupid?
ED REPLIES:
Sure you can, and he'd be
better off, since you seem to be a
shallow piece of work. Why would you be
bothered because your guy cares about
appearing presentable? If he starts trying on
your underwear, maybe you can question
whether you have too much in common,
but just because he doesn't want a
pizza face is no reason to worry.
Faze Reader:
My friend
has a wedgie
problem. She is
always picking
her butt in
public. Should I
confront her
about her
problem or buy
her some
granny panties?
ED REPLIES:
Well, depending on the cause of the
itch, you may need to direct her to 2-ply toilet
tissue. But I have it on good authority that full
panties, as you're suggesting, are actually worse for
getting caught in the crack of you butt. According to
female sources, the best bet is to get her into
thongs — they’re supposed to be up your butt,
so there's no need to pull at them.
Faze Reader:
How do I go about ignoring
my annoying little brother?
ED REPLIES:
Just like this..........................................
Faze Reader:
I met this guy I really like, and he really likes me too, but
he says I’m too much of a goody-girl. I don’t drink or do some
other stuff he does. He is one of those rebellious guys and I’m
not sure how to deal with him, but I like him. Besides, don’t
opposites attract?
ED REPLIES:
Sometimes they do, like in this case, where you have
common sense and he doesn't. I'm sure he wouldn't want you
harping on him all the time about his drinking and other misadventures, so
he should be showing you the same respect for your decisions. But to be
honest, "bad boys" are usually insecure and try to hide it with rebellious
behaviour that makes them feel in charge. Find someone who
doesn't need to act out, you'll be better off.
Look out for Ed's compilation CD!
Featuring "songs that don't suck"
(With tracks from Sum 41, Swollen Members, Gob, Bif Naked, LiveOnRelease and more)
Follow Faze on Twitter @FazeMagazine
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